Toxic Friends

I've been thinking recently about toxic friends. People we have as friends in our lives that may not be in our best interest. They are the friends that you have lunch with or talk on the phone to and you feel awful by the end of your time together. I've made a list of my top types of toxic friends. Can you identify any of these in your life?

Takers-These friends make you cringe when you see their number come up on caller id. You already know that need something from you, whether it is emotionally or financially or whatever. These friends drain the life out of you. The come by and plug into your life for a boost of energy and completely zap you of what you have. Usually these friends have a lot of drama or conflict in their lives.

Then there is the it's all about me friends. Most of these people are easy to spot, but I've found that a lot of self proclaimed unselfish friends really are very selfish in fact. These people are the type where it doesn't matter what you are talking about they somehow manage to turn the conversation back on themselves. Don't take these people to lunch unless you plan on being quiet the whole time.

Then we have the negative friends. Every time you talk to them it's doom and gloom. After you are done hanging out with them you feel like you need therapy. I've learned in my life that these people need to have drama and pain just to feel like their life is worth something. They also have no interest in solutions, they just want to keep talking about their problems.

Sabotogers These friends are the ones that pretend to be on your side, but in some subtle way they try to trip you up. These can also be known as fat friends. You know the type that as soon as you decide to give up chocolate and eat healthy are bringing you a batch of chocolate chip cookies that they baked especially for you. These types can be hard to spot. They seem so caring and loving to you. They listen to your problems and may have been your friend for years. You never know when this will pop up. This is the friend type that has taken me by surprise the most. When things started to hit a fantastic point for me all of the sudden things changed. Some of my closest friends tried to sabotoge my life.

Obsessive friends-This is a strange type of friend to have. They are the people that try to somehow live their lives through you. They are talking to other people about you and what you are doing. They try to take matters into their own hands to solve your problems. For some odd reason you are on their mind a lot. I believe that typically these people have little going on in their life or might be trying to escape their own lives and jump into yours.


How do you deal with toxic friends? I always think that being up front and honest is the best way to deal with everything. I know tons of people hate conflict, but pretending that everything is ok is living a lie. Confronting toxic friends is not an easy task. Their own sensitivity or low self esteem could cause a huge back lash to come against you. Be prepared. They may even decide to not be friends anymore. That's ok if they do. Regardless how long a relationship has been going on having someone in your life that is not there for you in good and bad is not worth having around.