Don't Cry For Me

It’s been a strange year for some of my friends and myself in the land of love and relationships. Of course when it comes to matters of the heart there aren’t any hard and fast rules. It’s been a year of ups and downs and with only a few weeks left until it is over who knows what lies ahead to finish this year or for next year. Aahhh… the hope that come spring a new romance will bloom. To be honest I started off the year as a hopeful romantic, but now as the year starts to draw to a close I find myself still somewhat cynical and jaded when it comes to relationships. This has not been my year for men and relationships. I’m the type of girl who doesn’t want to put up with a lot of garbage and I won’t settle. That’s just me. I think of the phrase to thine ownself be true. When it comes to relationships I know myself and I know what I can live with and I know what the dealbreakers are. I wish many of my girlfriends felt the same way. They put up with so much garbage in relationships. They compromise and then in the end feel terrible or take the blame for everything. I wish they would be true to themselves. It would save them so much time and heartbreak. Something that has been more specifically strange this year to me is the different men who have cried when relationships ended. Let me say right away I have nothing against a man showing emotion. Good for him if he can or good for him if he choses not to. Each guy is different on how they handle things. I asked my friend Jason once about men crying and his response was something I never forgot. He said generally as a rule no, however it happens, but people also swim after they eat. Classic Jason. So, when a guy does cry what does that mean? Us girls assume it means that they really do care about us because that’s one of the reasons that we cry. So, I will give the guys the benefit of the doubt and believe that when a guy cries especially when the relationship is ending he is grieving the loss of you and the relationship. This crying scenario happened to a friend of mine recently. She repeated to me several times that she cried and the guy cried. I thought about that for a while and I have come to some conclusions. In the relationships that I have known about when the guy cries he could have easily made some sort of effort to change things. I think that possibly when a guy cries that us girls think that maybe there is hope. Well, he cried so I am sure he cares about me and maybe things will change. The thing is if a guy cries about you, but fails to take any action or make an effort to change or repair the relationship what does that mean? There’s a common phrase that actions speak louder than words, but sometimes its inaction that speaks the loudest. So, if a guy cries while you walk out the door then what? Well ladies, maybe we should keep walking. Because no matter if he was a good guy or has the potential to be a great guy the fact is that he let you go. Life is short and you deserve to be with the guy who takes you by the hand and walks side by side with you in life and not the one who even though he cried he still let you walk out the door.